No matter how tirelessly you read and reread your e-mail written for your N+2, to request an appointment "asap" with her, she understood between the lines - and contrary to what you wanted – that you are annoyed, even very upset, and maybe even against her.
Hence a defensive response.
Indeed, put down in writing, and bursting into the daily life of the interlocutor whose state of mind we do not necessarily know at the moment T, certain formulations are not forgiving.
Which to avoid?
The point with Anne-Marie Gaignard, author of
Coaching for an effective and faultless e-mail
(Edition de Boeck Supérieur, 2019).
Read also4 unstoppable tips for not sending the email you will regret
The high caps
A GREAT CLASSIC… But always good to remember all the same.
Never ever write in capitals, not even a single sentence, let alone an entire email.
Upon reading, the recipient of said email will imagine you screaming behind your screen while you write.
"It's so obvious!
It's more or less the same thing with highlighting or the use of bold, it's too injunctive and infantilizing”, recommends the author.
So we avoid.
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Excess punctuation
Far be it from us to deprive you of this, but just remember that you are writing an e-mail in a professional context and not a novel that is supposed to leave its reader in suspense... there is nothing worse and yet, we see them everywhere,” says Anne-Marie Gaignard.
Smileys without moderation
By dint of communicating mainly by e-mail in recent years, especially during successive confinements, it would seem that polite formulas and elegant turns of phrase have gone by the wayside.
And replaced by smileys at the end of each sentence to soften the content or pass the pill of an urgent request issued the day before for the next day.
"Which is the proof that weighing your words is always important", underlines Anne-Marie Gaignard.
Our advice?
Pay attention to the formulations, even if it means overdoing it, and the emoticons will no longer be necessary.
The famous “Thank you for”
“Under cover of politeness, the formula is almost an injunction, analyzes the specialist.
Everyone wants to get through their unread messages as quickly as possible, and respond too quickly.
We are excessively instantaneous.
Sometimes it's better to think about an idea seven times in your head before writing.
Because any abrupt sentence will certainly be received by its interlocutor in an aggressive way.
Ditto for the famous: "waiting for your answer" or "thank you for your return", which imply that the person may not answer.
In summary: more softness, more confidence, it's always good.
You have to be careful and not forget who you are talking to, even if you write it in leggings, from your living room
Anne-Marie Gaignard
The use of the conditional
In a professional context, the conditional is to be avoided since it suggests, as its name indicates, a condition: "As if there were a problem in the air which is not resolved, or worse, which we would already anticipate the consequences.
It's almost a threat, ”warns Anne-Marie Gaignard.
To avoid misinterpretations, the “I would like” or other “I would have thought that” should therefore be handled with care.
The use of the present tense is always recommended in a professional e-mail.
Before writing an e-mail in which you are content, do not forget to proofread or even send it to yourself.
How would you feel if you read it?
Even if you use the addressee as tu, imagine that you are using the address before formulating your message, this will help you find a more respectful distance.
“An e-mail remains legal proof, concludes Anne-Marie Gaignard.
So you have to be careful and not forget who you are talking to, even if you write it in leggings, from your living room.