Raising Submarine Parents: Does more harm to kids than lawnmower and helicopter parents, according to educator

Created: 07/09/2022, 09:00

By: Natalie Hull Drawbar

Helicopter parents, lawnmower parents and now submarine parents?

A pedagogue criticizes the educational style, also as a problem towards teachers.

Munich – When it comes to upbringing and upbringing styles, experts and educators like to fall back on these wonderful pictorial terms.

Because the way parents treat their children couldn't be described better: helicopter parents buzz around their children in a controlling and overprotective manner, lawn mower parents would like to clear all dangers out of their children's path and submarine parents literally dive into hiding .

Upbringing of submarine parents: too little interest and support from the children

U-Boot parents are less supportive and initially don't notice when their child has difficulties, for example at school.

(Iconic image) © Janine Schmitz/photothek.de/Imago

If the certificate is not good enough, a punishment is considered unfair, so-called submarine parents can go on the offensive to supposedly protect their child.

In her eyes, an open and nonjudgmental conversation with the teacher doesn't seem to help much.

It is not uncommon for the matter to be settled with a complaint to the school administration, a letter from a lawyer or even a complaint against the teacher - for example because the child does not let the child go to the toilet during class.

The difficulty: Until the escalation occurs, U-Boot parents are hardly or not at all present and only take a position when difficulties already exist.

"They don't show up, don't go to parents' meetings, don't talk to the teachers - only when the transfer is at risk do they bring out the heavy artillery." The educator and lecturer for school law at the Institute for Teacher Training in Essen-Werden, Thomas, speaks based on this situation Bohm, from experience.

From the parents' point of view, most disputes between parents and teachers are due to unfair grades in their children.

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The main reason for the conflict was that U-boat parents questioned the authority of the teachers, Böhm told Focus Online.

Then it would not be unusual for parents to take legal action - although their success rate is well below 50 percent, the school lawyer reports.

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Raising Submarine Parents: Harms Kids More Than Helicopter Parents, Educator Says

The children who actually suffer in the conflict are often the children, because the focus of their parents is initially on the critical debate with the teacher instead of on the relationship with their child and the prevention or finding a solution to possible (school) difficulties.

From Thomas Böhm's point of view, U-boat parents would rather harm their children because they would not provide the child with enough support and would show too little willingness to trusting cooperation with the teachers.

And that where teachers felt overwhelmed anyway due to the corona pandemic.

In addition to the submarine parents, the excessive care of the now much-mentioned "helicopter parents" is also a challenge, because the risk of behavioral disorders in the children increases.

"This exaggerated behavior can be annoying for teachers," explains pedagogue Thomas Böhm to "Focus Online".

"But at least they have a serious interest in their children's educational success." Which, according to studies, makes children of helicopter parents even more successful later in life.

The so-called lawn mower parents, who are in a sense a form of helicopter parents, also try to educate their children through excessive, protective behavior, but their children are often not able to cope with tasks alone, make decisions and get along in the long term self-motivated to motivate.

This can also become a problem in their school career, which is why experts warn of the consequences of being brought up by lawnmower parents.

This article only contains general information on the respective health topic and is therefore not intended for self-diagnosis, treatment or medication.

In no way does it replace a visit to the doctor.

Unfortunately, our editors are not allowed to answer individual questions about clinical pictures.