Soon we will all be forgotten from the debriefing.

It's hard to believe that a "wedding at first sight" will change

It is not to be expected that anyone or anything from the production of "Wedding" will go through a "process," as psychologists like to say, following the investigation into what goes on behind the scenes of reality.

It's a reality, and in reality the rules are that there are no rules.

The participant is material in the editor's hand and everyone who is photographed should take into account that it will come out tooth and nail

David Rosenthal

06/06/2022

Monday, 06 June 2022, 08:06 Updated: 08:14

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Signed with Mano and Danny Ziskind (system)

One of the sentences that lawyers really like to say is "you know how you get into court, but you have no idea how you get out".

Even veteran lawyers can arrive as whole people who are confident in their righteousness and come out with fragments of a vessel with a verdict that in their humble opinion is fundamentally distorted.

The same is true of reality shows.

Your fate is completely out of your hands and even if you have a case to go out "the good ones", the manipulative editor will already take care of dissolving it if necessary.

Immediately after Eran Suissa's research in "Israel Today" on "Wedding at First Sight", the voices of the categorizers arose.

On Twitter, the High Court for all matters whatsoever, many addressed complaints of dismissal, quoting the participants themselves and grinning at them.

Know what?

In a considerable degree of justice.

You do not have to be a media student to understand what a voluntary deposit in the hands of a rating-seeking production means.

More on Walla!

"We came in happy, we came out crushed with a desire to die": the harsh testimonies of participants in "Wedding at First Sight"

To the full article

Danny and Yael (Photo: Oded Karni)

And yet, despite the sarcasm required, there are many reasons why this research is important.

On the curious-gossipy level he fulfills an almost existential need.

For example, the fact that no matter how many discrepancies there are, only one pair will always retire in the first few weeks.

The widespread propaganda that even unsuitable couples have been forced by implicit threats to continue the program, is further reinforced by the interviewees' remarks.

We all guessed it was a product of a lot of production pressure (Maayan and Omri were the second pair in the same season he cut, but it only happened before the finish line and thanks to the increasing number of pairs).

When participants launch a thick hint that this is the reason they stayed together against their will, along with the contract revealed in the investigation, this thinking gets an official stamp.

Aiming for a catharsis dose and closing the circle of curiosity is really nice, but beyond the curiosity and a liter of gossip thrown into the masses, the research also begs a number of fundamental questions in relation to the program.

The main one, of course, is the ethics of the professionals leading the participants.

If in fact the fact that a qualified psychologist or therapist is involved in a reality show has a flaw in the first place, then the intensity of the injury and predation, at least as it is described by the participants, already raises distrust towards the entire profession.

If the testimony of Dovi Amira is correct, who claimed that she did not come to Arik's birthday hosted by Yael Doron and then her face was blackened because of it - there is a serious ethical issue here, reality or not.

It remains only to wonder what the Histadrut of Psychologists has to say on the matter, and especially why they have had nothing to say on the subject to this day.

Dobi Amira, wedding at first sight (Photo: screenshot, Keshet 12)

Another interesting question concerns the viewers' perspective.

The vast majority of surgeries so far have been light-weight - that is, an interpretation that does not take business seriously, and yet the mountains of words have created, for better or worse, a huge buzz and a crucial impact on participants' mental state.

Will the media be more forgiving from now on?

Or will viewers suspect in every frame that it is pasted and taken out of context and assume that things are not as they seem?

Will all of these, and of course writing these lines within them, do the mental arithmetic and come to terms with the fact that what we see on screen does not provide the full picture?

It is hard to expect that who or what from the production of the program will go through a "process", as psychologists like to say, just as Yedioth Ahronoth's investigation into what happened at the "Big Brother" house a decade ago did not change the program format, attitude to participants and even the mix.

It's a reality, and in reality the rules are that there are no rules.

The participant is material in the editor's hand and anyone who is photographed for such a program should take into account that he will come out of it tooth and nail.

This is a jungle where it is very difficult even for skilled players to survive, especially for an ordinary person from the community.

And yet, there is a chance.

Ultimately, this research may give a refreshing boost to the whole "wedding at first sight" format.

Rainbow's Golden Egg may not be about to disappear anytime soon, but maybe even there they will understand that it's time for a change.

So far we have dealt with the moral aspect, but this is also true at the program level.

The wedding episodes are long and tedious, the regular route is expected and drains to a peak of a couples weekend, followed by a dull emptiness and disgust. It must have a twist. And since there is no choice but to reach the finish line with five couples, the solution may be Budget for that), so that more can retire in the middle of the road.

"What was surprising was that even participants who seemingly came out of the process well, were damaged by it. All our relationships were damaged, whether we came out well or not - parents, friends, spouses, everything changed," one of the interviewees sadly concluded.

Will her words, like those of the other interviewees, scare enough the brides and grooms of 2023 and 2024?

Will anything change in the thinking of producing the program and lead to better results at all levels?

Anything is possible, but in the meantime these questions have one answer that consists of four words: Do not build on it.

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