"Exposed to hatred"

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STRINGER / EPA

The Taliban's seizure of power in Afghanistan in Kabul still seems unreal to me, like a nightmare from which I no longer wake up.

The sounds of rockets and bullets in my hometown of Herat, which struck the windows of our family house during the 13 days of resistance there, can still be heard in my ears.

As a child, I saw terrible scenes with the Taliban.

They come back to my mind now.

Once they shot a young man in front of our eyes for no apparent reason.

The Taliban put a woman who allegedly sinned in a large gasoline barrel, then rolled the woman down the street in that barrel.

I remember defendants who had several kilos of stones hung around their necks and then dipped their heads in mud.

We children viewed such scenes with bizarre interest.

We didn't know about human rights.

We didn't know of any lawsuits.

The principle of prosecution and defense was unknown to us.

But the psychological effect of these punitive actions is to this day in all of us who have experienced them.

After the Taliban returned to the provincial cities, I hurriedly traveled from Kabul to my hometown of Herat.

I hid my face behind a traditional Afghan scarf and ventured out into town a few times to check the situation.

The streets were empty.

There were no soldiers there guarding the city, no children who went to school as they usually did in the mornings, and no teachers either.

Not even traffic cops.

My wife asked me not to go out again.

She said she was terrified in the face of these wild faces of Taliban fighters who obviously did not belong to any disciplined law enforcement agency.

The Taliban were the only ones walking through the city at all.

The city of Herat stands for a thousand years old civilization, for science and culture.

It is difficult for us to bear to look into these faces that are so endlessly far removed from civilization.

During those days, my wife and I would cry together sometimes.

In feel pain in my heart

I think of the 60,000 Afghan government soldiers who died in the past twenty years trying to bring us freedom and who are now buried in the Afghan soil.

Our political leaders had left Afghanistan and we, a motivated generation who stood up for democracy and liberation, stayed behind and this generation, which has grown up over the past two decades, is now being harassed for their convictions by Taliban soldiers at home.

The Taliban accuse us of standing up for democracy, for human rights, for women's rights and for refusing to submit to slavery and imprisonment by extremism.

They had announced a general amnesty.

They said that they would forgive us of our sins.

But most of them didn't believe them for a second.

I have written countless articles and reports in support of the young democracy in Afghanistan during these years.

That is why my family and I see ourselves as being severely threatened by the Taliban.

I wrote about the tragedies caused by the Taliban. About the girl Mersana, who lost her mother in a fatal suicide attack when she was only one year old. About Rahimullah, the policeman who was blinded by the Taliban a decade ago. About Rokhshana, Hazargol and Zahra, the girls who burned to death in an explosion, and about a man who two years ago in Ghor province lost his six children in one day to the Taliban mines.

I thought of all these people who lost their lives or their integrity in the fatal suicide bombings in all parts of Afghanistan.

It is impossible for me to trust this group who are now in power and whose hands are stained with the blood of thousands of innocent people.

When three Taliban soldiers were looking for me in Herat, I decided to leave Afghanistan.

Through the mediation of a friend, my family - my wife and our two children and I - were able to cross the Taliban-controlled border crossing into Iran.

With the support of the German government and Reporters Without Borders, we got to Germany.

Yet thousands of others are still trapped in the cities of Afghanistan.

They are grieved and exposed unprotected to the hatred of the extremists.

I know that immigration from war zones has turned your life in Germany upside down.

I also know that there have been immigrants who threatened the lives of German citizens.

Let me answer the great nation of Germany in the words of the poet Hafez Shirazi and assure you: “We did not come here to strive for importance and influence.

We came here to seek refuge after grave misfortunes. "

Less than ten days before my trip to Germany, I could never have imagined emigrating from my home country to another part of the world.

Life in Europe was never part of my plans.

Unless I was forced to because my country was being taken over by extremists.

Europe is beautiful, of course, but it is also very nice to be where you are at home, among the people of your own home country.

Serving this troubled company was what drove me, it all seemed worth the effort.

There was something significant about facing this country and its challenges.

I haven't spent a single day without work in the past 20 years.

I had, as they say, a successful career.

I have been named the best journalist in my country or province several times.

But now in Germany I stand here empty-handed, without language and without any idea of ​​what the future might look like.

It will take months and years to get used to the culture, with all the usual habits and lifestyle here.

After all, I know that Germans believe in democracy and freedom of expression and in freedom of religion.

Still, I am full of concern.

It is inconceivable to me to be dependent on welfare or to be out of work.

In the one month that I am in Germany, I have seen three times that a German refused to answer even one question about an address.

You may have no idea how much the human heart contracts painfully at such a moment.

I wish you never have to experience this.

Many of us will only be guests here temporarily.

We pray and wish that peace will come to Afghanistan and that we will return to our country.