The Luber family home in Beit El mourns the loss of their son Jonathan, who fell in battle in the Gaza Strip last Monday. Jonathan's kind eyes under his helmet, long wigs and beard, look out from the pictures in every corner of the crowded courtyard comforting. His face radiates light, peace and burning inner joy.
Staff Sgt. (res.) Elisha Jonathan Luber, a resident of Yitzhar, left behind eight brothers, a pregnant wife and a ten-month-old baby. Even in the midst of the pain, his parents, Haggai and Techaya, are unable to converge only on their own pain. Hagai Louvre, the actor, man of culture and theater, wants to talk about the day after - not in Gaza, but in Israel.
"I knew it was Jonathan." Tehiya and Hagai Louvre, Photo: Oren Ben Hakon
"We have passed the stage of slogans of 'together we will win,'" he says, "These are slogans that I am not against, because they give strength, but we need a clear and orderly work plan. With the best minds, with donors and with a massive campaign to redefine the boundaries of consent. Not just talk about unity, because it's ineffective."
"Maybe we, bereaved families from all sectors, should take the lead, because we have a broad and deep public consensus. I just spoke with a Knesset member who came to console her, and she said that everyone has to find the good in the other. I told her: 'Enough, enough, these are words of actions we passed in Bnei Akiva.' Now we need an organized work plan and good people who will devote themselves to its implementation."
"There is no such situation - I am entering Gaza." Jonathan Luber who fell in the Gaza Strip, photo: None
What Hagai seeks to promote is the creation of a social contract – not on the essence but on the procedure, not on the conclusions but on the agreements: "We must formulate a charter that will define that there are no more road blockades, neither of 'this is our country' nor of 'brothers in arms.' That there is no more price tag or burning of Huwara. That there is no more call for refusal. That there is no more gutter language towards elected officials and secular or religious, Tel Avivians or settlers. There is no more 'violence we will win,' it has passed."
"We've passed the slogan stage of 'together we will win.'" Israeli Judo Championships (illustration), photo: Oren Aharoni
Yes to unity, no to the margins
"This is my plan of action to commemorate Jonathan: to join bereaved parents, together we will join forces and together we will determine the boundaries of the discourse. In my opinion, going to elections is needed only six months after the end of the war, after there is a commitment by all sides to accept the judgment of the voters. The charter should not deal with content, questions of substance about haredi recruitment or the future of settlement. This will be decided by the public at the ballot box. But just as my son fought with Negev, I will stand with a submachine gun – metaphorically, of course – in the unity war."
"We will not allow people who think like us, or who think differently from us, to push the boundaries of consent. We will not let you, marginalized, plunge us into a dispute again. We will marginalize until their opinion becomes bizarre. It's a long process, but it will happen and it will be our real victory in the war."
"We are the Chofetz Chaim people and together with us, behind us, alongside us and before us, the people will stand, and will not let the margins create discord again. A politician who does not sign this social contract, a right-winger or a left-winger – we will call on the people not to vote for him."
"Together we will join forces and together we will determine the boundaries of the dialogue." The bereaved parents of Samar Lavi Lifshitz in their home in Modi'in (archive), photo: Yehonatan Shaul
What does it mean for you to accept the judgment of the voter?
"I am a veteran settler, 34 years in Beit El, and I will accept every judgment of the voter. If a government headed by Yair Golan is elected and this government decides to evacuate Beit El, I tell you, my fellow settlers, I get up and go. And if a government is elected that will turn Beit El into a city, then let people respect and accept it. Because if there are no boundaries to discourse, there is no nation."
Respect the majority decision
As she spoke, Tehiya reaches out and holds Haggai's hand. He massages her hand, excited and tearful and agitated, not noticing the force of her grip until she catches his attention. "Sorry, sweetheart. I hurt you," he apologizes. "It's okay. I'm the one who is used to holding your hand tightly," reassures Tehiya.
She is a lioness woman who, throughout the interview, manages to collect the pain, and does not allow tears to burst. "If we don't do what Hagai suggests, the enemies in the houses in front of us will dance here with fireworks in the sky," she says, pointing to the outskirts of Ramallah, which abuts the road near their home: "They are happy that we fight.
"All out of love." Jonathan z"l and his wife Avia, photo: Oren Ben Hakon
"As a kindergarten teacher, I explain to the children in kindergarten that the decision of the majority must be respected. When there is a disagreement in kindergarten – for example, which cake we will make for a birthday, in the shape of a butterfly or a house – I do a process of choosing and voting with the children, and really sketch out for them what each one wants. If most children wanted a butterfly, the child who wanted a home understands that he cannot lie on the floor and scream.
"It's the same in the country. It can't be that people won't accept the majority decision. Our Jonathan was a very gentle guy. He never imposed his opinion on anything and didn't like to speak slander, so when they gossiped at our Shabbat table, as everyone else does, he would continue singing. In pre-basic training, he met secular people for the first time, and he connected and loved them so much that he was really sorry when they transferred him to the Middle Schools."
The love, the hatred
Jonathan enlisted for regular service in the IDF after several years of Torah study. The service, as part of the "Central Seder", lasted about a year, during which time he married her father. He went to Gaza on reserve duty, bypassing his more combat brothers and brothers-in-law.
Funeral of Staff Sergeant (Res.) Elisha Jonathan Luber z"l, Photo: Oren Ben Hakon
Jonathan connected to Hasidism and was an Avrach at the Shepherd of Israel Yeshiva in Yitzhar and a dedicated youth coordinator. As someone who disliked a smartphone, he was not part of the family WhatsApp group, but in his welcoming way he added a unique rhythm and spirit to the family. "He did things slowly and thoroughly. We'd all finish the prayer, and he's still there. We took out Shabbat, it's still on Shabbat. All out of love," Hagai says.
"The funeral suited his pace. It lasted three and a half hours, and the sweet IDF allowed us to do so. Even in the midst of the abyss of pain, it was important for me at the funeral to talk about a subject that really hurt Jonathan. We would walk around the street and feel waves of hatred towards me with the kippah, and certainly towards Jonathan with the long wigs. I wrote posts very harshly against Brothers in Arms and against Yair Golan, whose heroic deed we all know.
"Let there be no doubt, I still disagree with them today, but I'm sorry I wrote in such an inflammatory and bad style. Tomorrow the sweet 'brothers in arms' will come here, and today the wonderful families of the abductees will arrive, with whom we love and hurt so much, and it doesn't matter to us in any way in which way they conduct the struggle. Jonathan was so pained by the pain of the abductees. He translated it into prayer and war."
Funeral of Staff Sergeant (Res.) Elisha Jonathan Luber z"l, Photo: Oren Ben Hakon
"I felt something would happen"
Alongside Jonathan, his two brothers, Elad and Itamar, also fought, as well as his brother-in-law, who for Hagai and Tahia is like a son. "From the moment the war began, I felt something would happen," says Tehiya. "When they say mom knows, then mom knows. I knew. On the Saturday before Jonathan's fall we had a double Shabbat. They gave us a last minute gift. We had so much fun together, but all Shabbat I told Hagai that my heart hurts. I was waiting for a knock on the door."
When the knock came, and with it the news of his son's death in Gaza, Hagai asked, "Which of the four sons?" Resurrection didn't have to ask. "I knew it was Jonathan," she says. This Thursday, Jonathan was supposed to celebrate his 25th birthday. His parents ask the public and leaders to give the soldier who gave his life for us a gift: one day of good talk.
Funeral of Staff Sergeant (Res.) Elisha Jonathan Luber z"l, Photo: Oren Ben Hakon
"Please, anyone who intends to write a divisive post, don't write. Or at least lower the flames first. It would be a wonderful gift for his birthday. Jonathan, who loved dancing so much, would just dance in the sky with joy."
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