A friend broke the surprising news to me on Friday that I share a birthday with Rishi Sunak. He added that he should take advantage of the circumstance to ask for an interview. Rishi Sunak, for those who don't know, is one of three individuals with roots in the old British colonies who now occupy the most important positions of power in the United Kingdom.
He is the prime minister, the other two chair the interior and foreign ministries. In theory they are subjects of the brand new Carlos III; In reality the king does what they say. Which has its grace, but the truth is that I don't want to meet Sunak. It bores me. I would be more interested in interviewing a worm.
Many times people ask me to tell them who are the most interesting people I interviewed in my long journalistic career, and who I have not interviewed yet that I would like to interview. In an attempt not to be asked any more, I will answer now.
We will go by categories. First, in the world of sport, we have Diego Maradona, Lionel Messi, Michael Jordan, Rafa Nadal, Zinédine Zidane, Ronaldo (the Brazilian), Pep Guardiola, Alex Ferguson and Marcelo Bielsa.
Maradona: fantastic. Charisma that came out of his pores, endearing demagogue and (with me) liar. On the eve of the most glorious battle in Argentine history, the quarterfinals of the 1986 World Cup against England, four years after the Falklands War, that match of "the hand of God" and the best goal in the history of the world, Diego told me: "No, no. The Falklands nothing to see. How are journalists! No. We don't think about it. England is just another opponent, another game and that's it." Messi and Zidane? Before Sunak. After those two it would have been fascinating to sit down and talk to that worm. Nadal: a charm. Ronaldo: funny. Guardiola: a light. Bielsa: indecipherable. Ferguson: an edge. Jordan: Well...
I interviewed the greatest basketball player of all time when he had just concluded a tour of Europe. How had the trip gone? "Well, I felt a lot of respect." Is there anyone you respect? "Ummm... interesting question, it had never occurred to me to think about that..."The idol Jordan revealed to me how he is one of those characters who understands respect as something that is received, not given. Repellent.
Let's move on to the writers: Norman Mailer, VS Naipaul, Salman Rushdie. Mailer had a reputation that if he disliked you he would give you a trumpet. With me he was a teddy bear. I also tamed Naipaul, who did not resort to physical violence against journalists but kicked them out of his house within ten minutes if he thought they were fools. It was one of the great triumphs of my life. After an hour and a half he asked me to stay for tea with him and his wife. I had to lie in order to escape. I told him I had to take a flight to Spain. The truth, unspeakable before the Nobel Prize for literature, is that he did have a flight, but to Manchester to watch a Champions League match.
Rushdie would have understood. We talked about his books, about the fatwa that hung over him, but first of all we talked about football. He is a Tottenham fan. He said he celebrated when one of his books became a best-seller. But a victory by three to one of his team against Manchester United, "priceless".
Film artists: no coincidence that they are Clint Eastwood, Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon. Eastwood: dry, ironic, as one would expect. He told me that being a film director was like being a carpenter. One puts scenes together; the other, wood cuts. Freeman: affectionate, friendly and mischievous, once you broke the ice. Damon invited me to his megasuite for dinner with his wife, mother-in-law, and children. Since the mother-in-law and wife were Argentine (we all have our weaknesses) I spent the night chatting more with them than with him. Intelligent and serene, Damon. He was amused that he barely paid attention to him.
Politicians (not excluding dictators): there are too many but I would highlight the figures of Nelson Mandela, Bill Clinton, Boris Johnson and Efraín Rios Montt. Mandela: I never met anyone with more class, as a person or as a leader. Clinton: Brilliant and I knew it. But I found the weak point. That's when I told him that after my time in South Africa I was sent to Washington to cover his presidential stage. What was that transition like? He asked me. "From the sublime to the ridiculous," I replied. It turned red like a tomato. He thought, though it was not my intention, that I was referring to his affairs with Monica Lewinsky.
Boris Johnson: hungry ego and the world's most erudite clown. Ríos Montt, military dictator of Guatemala, Christian fundamentalist who massacred indigenous people. He explained to me, exalted (his drug was God), that in that time of cold war the United States was "dad" and the Soviet Union "mom". Dad decided that the baby was behaving too badly and the day after we saw us he fell into a coup d'état.
I was fortunate enough to interview other serial killers, including the heads of the death squads of El Salvador and South Africa, but one that remains to be interviewed is the one who chairs the Russian state squad.
Yes, the person I most want to interview in the world that I haven't interviewed is Vladimir Putin. It would have to be in a safe place, outside of Russia, of course. Preferably in a cell of the international court in The Hague. I would just like to understand one thing. What's your problem? Why so much insecurity, so much paranoia, so much resentment? I would focus on his childhood and adolescence. His mother didn't love him? Did girls laugh at him at school? Too bad it's not going to happen but I would sacrifice all the other interviews I've done, go back in time and cancel them, for the chance. Well, maybe all of them, all of them – I think of Mandela and Maradona – don't.