Touching a shoulder to salute a remarkable job, hugging as a sign of empathy ... When words are not enough, touch takes over and adds more emotion to the message you send to others. A supplement of humanity in short.
“It represents a way of communicating, of sending signals. Touch is openness to others, which does not mean everyone. This is something that we share with the people we have chosen. It is essential and yet it has long been regarded as the poor relation of other senses. Today that we are deprived of it for health reasons, we realize how precious it is and we miss it ”, analyzes Meriem Salmi, psychologist and psychotherapist, author of“ Believe in your dreams and find your way ”(Ed Fayard).
Covid-19 requires, please distance yourself now to avoid the virus. However, the skin is not confined to a utilitarian role of perception of textures or temperatures. It is probably our first social organ, the one that contains neurons specialized in the transmission of positive affects, from parent-child relationships to the social bonds of adult life.
“Touch has many virtues. From neuroscience, we know that it helps babies to grow, to develop children's intelligence. It also helps with healing. A sick person who is affected is more reassured, therefore more able to fight, ”adds the psychologist.
Cécile, a young quadra, cruelly observes this with her grandmother. “She is blind, deaf and our only way to get in touch with her, to show our presence, is to touch her. Since the epidemic, as it is placed in an Ehpad, we can no longer do so. Result: it goes out slowly. "
"This will force us to verbalize our intentions more"
In social interactions, there are several types of physical contact. "Researchers Heslin and Apler count at least five," said Elodie Mielczareck, a semiolinguist. And the latter to list: the professional touch “which is part of a routine, like that of the hairdresser, the security guard or the doctor who, although his gesture can be intrusive, is accepted because framed and legal” , decrypts the expert.
The touch of politeness and social which makes it possible to initiate exchanges and to show others that they are accepted. The handshake falls into this category. The warm and friendly touch that comforts and ensures a certain level of relationship and commitment. The touch of intimacy and love more linked to sensuality and finally the sexual touch.
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VIDEO. Coronavirus: how to greet each other at work without shaking hands
"Touching is therefore a message, which is not interpreted in the same way depending on the context, the culture of individuals and the supposed intentions", summarizes the semiolinguist, author of "The Chameleon Strategy" (Ed. Du Cherche Midi ). She warns: “The crisis we are going through is not only health and economic. Indeed, the physical distance and the distance relationship, enabled by technology, completely disrupt our ways of communicating. We haven't figured it out yet. As sociologist Dominique Wolton reminds us, to inform is not to communicate: digital is very efficient for informing, but we are losing flesh and incarnation , but that is all communication at the same time. "
How are we going to manage this lack of physical contact? “We can understand each other without touching each other, but the message does not have the same depth. No doubt this will force us to verbalize our intentions more. I will not be surprised to see more metaphorical speeches in the months to come because the role of metaphor is precisely to embody the subject, "says Elodie Mielczareck. "People will adapt," says Meriem Salmi. They will understand that behind the fact of not touching the other, the message that is sent is I protect you because I care about you . "