It sometimes happens that a family is dysfunctional, that everyone's roles are reversed and that the child becomes the parent of his parent.
This is the case of a father or mother in serious psychological difficulty, after bereavement, divorce, depression or any other deep wound linked to a previous trauma.
The parent then leans on the child and unconsciously asks him to repair his wounds.
We talk (judiciously) about child therapist syndrome.
“The parent-child relationship transforms when the father or mother fails to manage their suffering over a long period of time and collapses,” informs Bruno Clavier, clinical psychologist, psychoanalyst and author of the book
These children who want to heal their parents
(1).
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Adapting to Support a Cracked Abutment
On the other hand, the child - whether a baby or teenager - absorbs the parent's emotions, and feels the family balance wavering.
However, “he needs to know that the people who take care of him are doing well,” explains Bruno Clavier.
If his parent is not the…
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