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Lonely in the pandemic: the virus is particularly dangerous for the elderly and people with previous illnesses
Photo: Philippe Leroux / plainpicture
The first corona lockdown is taking place these days.
Germany shut down public life for the first time a year ago, closing schools, sports clubs and restaurants.
It was done to protect everyone - but above all to protect the elderly.
Because they have the highest risk of getting seriously ill with the coronavirus.
How have the elders fared in this pandemic?
Here three of them tell what they miss most - and what strategies they have developed to survive the loneliness in the crisis.
"I feel the vaccination is a blessing"
Helga Vollertwessel, 80, lives near Lüneburg. She has three children and six grandchildren whom she would like to visit again for her birthday.
“Before Corona, I always had plans.
I met my bridge club, which I founded myself.
It has 30 members.
I also had a theater subscription and a gym membership, I've always done a lot of sports.
I went to the cinema regularly with a friend.
And then I met with my literature group.
These are all things that I can no longer do.
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Helga Vollertwessel while hiking
Photo: private
The beginning of the corona pandemic coincided with the death of my husband, whom I had accompanied for years during his serious illnesses.
We lived together for 46 years, 37 of which we were married.
Suddenly I was alone in my house and could no longer see anyone.
I wasn't allowed to visit my six grandchildren, and neither were my friends.
I couldn't travel.
It was a very difficult time.
I couldn't share my changed life with anyone.
I am not afraid of the virus, but I have respect.
For example, I very rarely go shopping; my daughter usually does it for me.
In the meantime I have adjusted my everyday life quite well for the virus.
At lunchtime I always go hiking for an hour or two.
I arrange to meet different friends, always at the same time.
We drive to the starting point in separate cars.
Then we start from there.
We are like boy scouts, we have already discovered so many great paths, this is a dream.
Although I've lived in the region for 50 years, we would never have thought of it without Corona.
When spring comes, I can work in my garden again.
At temperatures above 10 degrees we will conquer the Elbmarsch with our e-bikes.
Last spring and summer we drove 1500 kilometers - fantastic tours with a delicious picnic.
I now play bridge online, my literature group meets via video.
Actually there was always coffee and cake when we discussed the books.
You can't do that online.
It's kind of weird watching other people eat on the screen.
What I miss is the physical closeness.
Just hug someone, that's no longer possible.
Or visit my grandchildren for their birthday.
It is a great loss.
On March 29
should I finally be vaccinated.
I think the vaccination is a blessing.
I was born in 1940 and as a child I saw what life was like without vaccines.
If you had a childhood disease, such as rubella or measles, you were sick for weeks.
And sometimes it was worse.
The pandemic cannot be compared to the war, life was much harder back then.
Today I live in prosperity, it is warm, I have food and lots of opportunities to communicate.
Nevertheless, I believe that Corona will be a turning point - it will never be again like in the time before.
Even if I have other options after the vaccination - we will keep hiking in autumn and winter.
Then I can go on our scout expeditions in the car with my girlfriend. «
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I've never felt as lonely as I did last year
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Gerd-Dieter Tillner, 79 years old, has two sons and has been living in a retirement home in Neuss for ten years. The beginnings of the corona pandemic were unbearable for him.
“It was like a prison.
When the pandemic really broke out and we were locked in our rooms in April 2020, all I could do was watch TV and read.
We weren't even allowed to meet in the corridors; for almost a year I ate alone in my room every day.
I have a single room, which is of course even more lonely.
I've never felt as lonely as I did last year.
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Gerd-Dieter Tillner in his room in the retirement home
Photo: Maik Mosheim
My wife died 35 years ago when my two sons were still children, I raised them alone.
I was a programmer, IT specialist as one would say today.
Today I feel the gratitude of my sons, it is a give and take, now I am very happy to accept their visits and affection.
You come to me as often as you can.
During the time we were locked up, there were panes of glass between us, fortunately that is no longer necessary.
My sons gave me strength and so did my granddaughter.
She is my sunshine.
I have a picture of her and me right next to the television, it always reminds me of her.
I was vaccinated with Biontech but I didn't care what vaccine I got.
It was completely clear to me from the start: I want to be vaccinated, no matter what.
I wasn't afraid of side effects.
What annoys me is the larifari of politics that so few people are still vaccinated.
My brother is 86, does not live in the home and has twice been unable to keep an appointment because there was not enough vaccine.
Here in the home, the vaccination has finally brought life back: Since we have almost all been vaccinated here, we can eat together again in the dining room, do gymnastics and play memory games.
That was a huge relief for me and for everyone else.
Sadly, some of our residents died of the virus.
It was bad that we didn't find out when someone was gone.
Nobody then knew whether the person was in the hospital or dead.
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Before, before I came to the home, I was very active, was in the shooting club and the bowling club.
With the bowling club we have made long trips to the Caribbean or Cuba over and over again, and those were real experiences.
I would love to do a trip like this again, but in a wheelchair and with the pandemic it's difficult.
Although we're well protected in here now that I can't go anywhere I want, I miss it very much. "
"At the last meeting she already stretched out her arms and then only said: Feel hugged."
Brigitte Behr, 74 years old, used to work as an office clerk. She has a daughter and a granddaughter and lives in Hamburg.
»Before Corona, I went to the AWO senior club once or twice a week to do sports and water aerobics rehabilitation.
I also have an annual pass for Hagenbeck's zoo.
I miss all of that very much at the moment.
I even only go shopping once a week and I no longer use public transport.
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Brigitte Behr on a vacation trip - before Corona
Photo: private
My three friends and I only talk on the phone.
One lives very close to me, I usually see her once a week, and I actually meet with the other two once or twice a month.
I am not afraid, but we are all over 70, we belong to the risk group and I think one shouldn't challenge fate.
I miss this human contact.
The young couple with me on the floor in the skyscraper just had a baby, since then we've only been using the elevator separately.
I would have liked to look into the stroller, the baby is too cute.
Meeting for a walk isn't that easy either.
It's cold, there is nowhere to go for a coffee, and most importantly, there is nowhere to go to the bathroom.
We older people have to go to the toilet at some point.
I see my 21-year-old granddaughter once a week, but only with a mask.
And we don't hug.
That's really bad.
The last time she stretched out her arms and then only said: 'Feel hugged'.
Just hug my daughter or granddaughter again, I miss that physical contact.
"I'm slowly getting mad"
I'm not a housewife, I've never been able to just do the household chores.
During the day I play cards on my tablet, listen to the news on the radio, and from 6 p.m. I turn on the television.
If the weather permits, I also go for a walk alone, but sometimes the park is very crowded and I prefer to leave it.
I am a positive person, but slowly getting on my mind.
At least the weather was nice at the first lockdown, the second one fell in the darkest season of the year, so that was a burden for me.
I feel powerless.
There are moments when I'm about to cry.
Sometimes I think I get depressed when I notice that I've been sitting in the armchair for two hours, looking against the wall and having thoughts that I can't control.
Then it helps me to get up, make myself a coffee, or take a lap around the block.
Sometimes I turn on the TV in the afternoon and watch a nature program, that brings you out a bit.
One of my friends is not doing well either. She often calls me and says: 'Can we have a little chat?
I'm in such a low right now '.
I'm looking forward to going to Büsum, I do that every May.
I hope it works - if not in May, then in autumn at the latest.
And I look forward to when it gets warmer and you can eat an ice cream outside again, see something different, meet other people.
Even if it is by far. "
