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Michael Wendler and Laura Müller
It's not all bad at Christmas!
And on the internet.
For example, the holidays give us the wonderful, contemplative opportunity to legally look around the living rooms of rich to super-rich celebrities.
Cool.
Because whoever of them is self-respecting posts a photo of themselves with their partner, offspring and / or pet in front of a four-meter-tall Christmas tree from mid-December to the end of December, and our inner table is set.
Have you ever noticed how awful these pictures are? Kindly repulsive, if you ask me. Sure, nobody wants something bad with it, these are just very busy people who want to wish their favorite 7.5 million followers a cozy time - and it works too! Because those who definitely have a good time with these photos are normal mortal users with a heightened interest in interior design (me). In case you're wondering which wretched psychopaths zoom in on such images - me.
A reader recently told me to stop pretending to be "normal" in my columns, because I would earn too much and have too much reach.
Slow down, my angel, as long as I don't have a soulless white tiled living room with floor-to-ceiling windows, I'm definitely not one of those up there, because - just have a look at that.
The holiday living room photos of many glossy celebrities are so similar that it could theoretically be that there is a backdrop somewhere that you can briefly rent for a photo shoot, but we don't want to assume that.
The most important ingredients for an absolutely soulless celebrity living room are: Floor covering that looks as cold as possible, from which even underfloor heating cannot conjure up a spark of cosiness, tiles, stone or laminate with the most unrealistic look possible. In addition: walls as white as possible and furniture with high-gloss fronts as white as possible, an ungodly large sofa landscape (light gray or beige) that looks like it was just delivered, and in the background long, light gray or light beige curtains (type “funeral home” or “aesthetic surgery clinic”) «) In front of the floor-to-ceiling windows, which are supposed to protect the completely indifferent and heartlessly put together belongings from the prying eyes of design lovers - but nothing if they let themselves be photographed so generously and you can still see everything, hehe.
The obvious furnishing goal for each of these rooms was to combine the cosiness of a newly renovated dental practice with the uniqueness of a chain hotel lobby.
It worked!
There is never anything lying around in these photos, you will never find an open packet of biscuits, a cell phone cable, a kitchen towel or a half-read book, nothing of the junk, nothing with soul, nothing that is older than five years.
At most maybe an obese bulldog with a glitter collar or maybe a white vacuum-and-mopping robot ("our new friend"), which should be brought to the people at the same time as the posting, regardless of contemplation.
Ideally, the Christmas tree should be a monochrome decorated monster that reaches just below the ceiling. Lately, celebrity Christmas trees are white, freshly snowed in, I have no idea what's going on and where this trend is coming from, you would have to ask Kim Kardashian, Marco Meurer, İlkay Gündoğan or »Bibi's Beautypalace«. But not Heidi Klum, she containerized her slender Christmas tree from the garden rubbish of a flower shop - or is also extremely thin when it comes to trees, we don't know.
Stop for a moment - is it the envy speaking out of me? Certainly not, it would be far too much effort for me to lead a life like this, because effort is always made there, apart from the styling: Julian Draxler and his partner correctly have a giant tree decorated in white and covered with artificial snow (?) With loud pastel parcels underneath in a tiled ... wait a minute ... bathroom? Why? Does he live in a tiny house? Well, everyone as he likes.
Anyway, it's all a matter of taste, of course.
And certainly the main problem with the super-rich isn't that their homes are ugly.
Sure, we have other problems too, but we also have this one!
Why do we have to see all of this?
Well, "must" is a big word, but you can ask why they all live in such cold-hearted showrooms where you get the feeling just a little bit rotten inside.
The uplifting thing is that once you've seen these bleak sterile accommodations, you just don't want to get super rich and super famous anymore, just to make sure you don't end up in such a washable and interchangeable setting.
Cool and relieving.
