"What happened to me doesn't define me." Behind this new slogan, a new wave of testimonies from victims of sexual violence has been sweeping on social networks since the beginning of May. A peculiarity: these testimonies of adolescents, often minors, are made with their faces uncovered, a first.
It all started on April 29, the day of “Denim Day”, devoted to sexual violence, and a “place”, the Tik Tok network, adored by adolescents. Have therefore been posted by tens, then hundreds and thousands, of video clips in which young teenagers tell of the abuses they have been victims of. No blurring. Objective: to encourage the liberation of speech and to free oneself from all guilt.
Each video is more or less based on the same concept: in the background, a song by the popular group Imagine Dragons, "It's time" with lyrics. And in the image, therefore, girls and boys testifying, while showing the clothes they wore on the day of the aggression, in the philosophy of this "Denim Day", born in 1999 from the outcry caused by a decision of the Italian justice: the annulment of a conviction for rape on the grounds that the victim wore skinny jeans.
Heartbreaking testimonials
Difficult not to be touched by these heartbreaking testimonies where some cannot contain their tears, faced with memories that are sometimes still recent. But everyone sends the same message of hope. Their goal is to help those in the same situation by encouraging them to talk about it and report on it.
In three weeks, these videos have already made more than 100 million views worldwide.
The shock wave crossed the Atlantic and touched Italy - where the influential star Chiara Ferragni shared these messages of hope - and also France, where these TikTok videos were relayed by Anna Toumazoff, the creator of the hashtag #Ubercestover, which launched a real movement of testimonies of violence suffered in transport, taxis or Uber.
Young French women have therefore followed the example, on Instagram this time, and under the banner of a new hashtag: #vousnenousferezplustaire.
"I had anxiety, fear, but also pride"
"These videos were an electric shock for me, I understood that I was not alone," says one of them, Élodie *. “My assault took place about a year ago. I immediately buried it ... I recently put the word rape on what I had experienced. I am going through this trauma ”explains this young woman of 20 years, that testimonies, like that of Adèle Haenel or therefore those of young people on TikTok, have therefore helped to break the silence.
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"It is not easy, all my relatives will know it now, but I told myself that I was no longer alone, that I could do it too," said this young woman who now wants to be more activist. "Clearly it is a way to free myself, but also so that people understand: there are jokes that my loved ones will no longer do around me," says the young Burgundian.
At the time of taking action, "I had anxiety, fear, but also pride," she delivers, moved. “It was a relief and a real sense of purpose. I am passing this course: it is not anchored in me and it is not my fault and it does not have to define who I am ”concludes Élodie in tears.
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Text from @anamnesie “” People favor beautiful lies while INFECTED truth will languish alone in its corner ”. We silence her because she comes to cry out what is disturbing, what we don't want to hear. So it is this truth that we insult, that we point the finger at, that we penalize as if it were guilty of showing reality. She is hated because she is. Simply. “You say things as they are by claiming your rights, but they are too dirty to be heard! You are necessarily a liar because your truths are repugnant. Nobody wants your truths. ” So people are looking, in their bloody reserve, for excuses for their biggest nightmare: the exposure of the crimes that have taken place. They are witnesses, even accomplices, those promoting their false happiness to the truth in the shadows. So listen, you who are reading my text right now: believe when we confide in you. Know that I believe you. To cast doubt on the victim's words is to plunge him into the unhappiness and pain that he is already experiencing. Do not be blind, do not say that you are not taking sides: support. We believe you. ” #youwillfollow us
A post shared by aiLe🔙 (@_jtebaise_) on May 17, 2020 at 8:37 am PDT
Marianne *, another victim, has even taken an additional step: the complaint. “The story on TikTok videos was incredible. It made me cry a lot, but also smiled. For some time I had been trying to convince myself to go to file a complaint against my rapist, and it was this story that was the trigger. Today I went there. I went to file a complaint. I hadn't felt so light for far too long, ”says the girl.
"They expose themselves by doing this, it's very courageous"
For Anna Toumazoff, who received hundreds of messages after her "story", this movement is a real revolution. “The fact of seeing the faces of the victims is a real catalyst, there is a new dimension. We are no longer only in the #MeToo dimension where I balance my testimony. You see the people, their faces, their eyes, their emotions, the smiles with tears in their eyes, ”moves the feminist activist. “There is an inversion of the balance of power between victims and executioners. It is a generation which lives by the image, they expose themselves by doing that, it takes a monstrous courage "analyzes again this communicating woman who discovered the videos on TikTok through her little sister.
The same goes for social psychologist Domitille Raveau. “This generation appropriates the media to reverse the guilt. It's been a continuum since the #MeToo movement, but we go even further, the victims assume their story even more, and show even more courage, that's what makes it go viral ", analyzes the co-founder of the Consentis association. info which aims to create a culture of consent and to fight against sexual violence.
Will this example from the youngest touch the previous generation? "I don't know if I will ever dare to talk about it." But what I do know is that I built myself. I am a strong, committed woman, liberal nurse, he will not have destroyed me "underlines a mother, among the messages received by Anna Toumazoff. An additional ray of hope.
* First names have been changed
